SO NOW WHAT?

Well, here we are, less than two weeks away from the Big Day! How comes it is Wednesday again, already? How did that happen? Where did the time go? Mind you, I do not much care how quickly time passes leading into the Christmas break - as long as the Christmas Break itself does not pass too quickly! My Christmas Shopping stint for Hubby did not fulfil my expectations. The atmosphere was great and Croydon felt very festive. The trouble is, and I am almost sure it doesn't get any easier, Hubby and I have been together for so long now that we actually want for very little. What I'd like to give him is the opportunity to retire because I know that's what he wants. What he would like to give me is the opportunity to quit the day job, stay at home and write because he knows that's what I want. But both of those are currently out of the question so it means more nick-nacks like pens, socks, underwear and chocolate - all of which are readily available and all of which we have already got! Ah well - not to worry. We have at least got each other (who's making that retching noise?) and as long as we have that, I guess presents to unwrap on Christmas Day are just bonuses!

I have been in quite a reflective mood the last few days. I have hardly written a thing of late, which makes me both sad and ashamed. What I would really like to do is start my novel - the one I have been thinking about and researching and procrastinating over for at least a decade - and possibly longer. But with the third Yuck book still to write, the novel is going to have to take a back seat for a bit longer. And I miss my poetry a huge amount. No time. Saddest words ever written as Og Mandino says in "The Choice". I just don't know where 2007 has gone - along with all the hopes and dreams I had this time last year. And going through the menopause has not helped one iota! A few years ago all I'd have worried about was where the next poem was coming from. Lately it has been whether or not the Hot Flushes will restart (I had the first one in ages a week or so ago!) or if I will ever be fully myself again? Where am I going? Where will I be this time next year?

And the biggest question of all - who really gives a damn?